I think life is most interesting when you’re single and ready to move on to starting a new relationship. You’re ready to go out there into the vast, mystical forest of the dating scene, or maybe you already have a girl or guy in mind that you’re ready to take to the next level. It’s a scary and great moment of transition, excitement, dread, fear, and well…fun. And when you’ve been as single as long as I have, people take notice, and become supportive, and at times become your greatest cheerleaders.
I don’t know if I’m modest, a pessimist, or just plain don’t know what to do with compliments, but during times of potential love interests in my life (which is determined largely by my reputation points), I’m often told, “She’ll love you. She’ll see how great you are and it will be awesome.” Okay, not in so many words, but there are often words of encouragement of what a fantastic person I am, how so and so would be a fool not to see it, etc. I don’t know where that comes from. I realize that these comments are coming from my friends, so therefore, I am hoping they’re sincere, but really, they’re my friends, so I think they’re just being nice. Would you tell your friend how much of a scum bag, douche bucket, piece of llama excrement that had been skillfully been turned into a delicious cup of coffee, they are? Of course not! They’re your friends, and will tell you how great you are, which I realize, may mean that I may not be all that great.
Now I don’t know any of that. This is not a pity party, I just don’t know how other people perceive me. I’m hoping they’ll think I’m awesome, but then how does this translate into the dating scene? If my friends think I’m so brilliant, why is it that the ladies do not? I appreciate all the pats on the back, and the high fives saying what a good person I am, but that’s because my friends KNOW me. They’ve known me for years, they’ve seen every iteration of me, and they know what makes me tick. I’ve talked to them for hours, spilled my guts to them, and have even shown my more embarrassing side. These people are aware of this! The women who I could potentially be dating or getting into a relationship with, do not know this. They are blissfully unaware of what makes me awkward, a nerd, not worth their time and all together incredibly worth their time.
Dating to any degree is a person, meeting a woman for the first time (obviously). I think some people, though, have this expectation that, with all this bolstering up of their ego that they get from other friends and family, like those singers on American Idol, that we believe the women we encounter should just naturally love us. Why the hell should that happen? Idiotic reality TV makes romance seem as easy as a video game! Click on the right dialogue choices and she’ll fall madly in love with you. Of course! We forget that some people take time to develop that irresistable draw between the two of them. Others (the hornier ones), find that connection a few hours in and they’re already in bliss. For others still, it can take months or even years, before the girl or guy of their dreams finds you have the right amount of romance flags to be worth their time.
Then there is that person who catches you off guard. You never saw it coming, and you are hit like a freight train. Usually you date a few people, maybe more, and you go through dating websites to see who's worth your time, but sometimes...sometimes...all it takes is one. It doesn't happen very often, but when it does, you're left with the biggest conundrum of all. Do you believe what your friends have been telling you all this time? Are you really a great person, and do you think this girl or guy is going to see this? The heart wants what the heart wants, and we can feel it. So what do you do? Well, there's a friend of mine, who recently broke up with someone, and I can tell, she still thinks about her girlfriend quite a bit. She did not date or go online, she found someone who plowed into her heart like a bullet and lodged in there, killing her with the gunpowder of love. Will she get over it? Sure, in time. She was lucky to find someone she was so compatible with and can, even afterwards, try to remain friends. But what if you and the guy/girl aren't so Nsync? "Bye, bye bye...bye bye?"
The big question really is, if you find that one person, that fish in the sea, are they worth the wait? Well, that’s for you to decide, but if you feel you can’t wait, go and find someone else? You never know, that other person could be better than the person you’re waiting for. If…you are a romantic, like myself, then I suggest you wait. Build up that relationship with that girl or guy and let them see how amazing you are, and then when the time is right…love will bloom like a rose in June. Sure you’ll have to watch them go through relationships in the mean time, and hell, the romance between you two may not even happen. But then again, you’re a romantic. You give in to that movie and story book bullshit.